Thursday, August 31, 2006
HEART WARMING....................
Denis OCallaghan
This is a story about Carl..
I think we all can learn a lesson from this..
It is a tear jerker, so get yourself a kleenex, a cup of coffee, tea, or soda, and enjoy...
This sure did touch my heart, and I hope that it will touch yours as well.
A Lesson in Love
Carl was a quiet man. He didn't talk much. He would always greet you with a big smile and a firm handshake. Even after living in our neighborhood for over 50 years, no one could really say they knew him very well. Before his retirement, he took the bus to work each morning.
The lone sight of him walking down the street often worried us. He had a slight limp from a bullet wound received in WWII. Watching him, we worried that although he had survived WWII, he may not make it through our changing uptown neighborhood with its ever-increasing random violence, gangs, and drug activity.
When he saw the flyer at our local church asking for volunteers for caring for the gardens behind the minister's residence, he responded in his characteristically unassuming manner. Without fanfare, h e just signed up.
He was well into his 87th year when the very thing we had always feared finally happened. He was just finishing his watering for the day when three gang members approached him. Ignoring their attempt to intimidate him, he simply asked,
"Would you like a drink from the hose?"
The tallest and toughest-looking of the three said, "Yeah, sure,"
with a malevolent little smile.
As Carl offered the hose to him, the other two grabbed Carl's arm, throwing him down. As the hose snaked crazily over the ground, dousing everything in its way, Carl's assailants stole his retirement watch and his wallet, and then fled.
Carl tried to get himself up, but he had been thrown down on his bad leg. He lay there trying to gather himself as the minister came running to help him..
Although the minister had witnessed the attack from his window, he couldn't get there fast enough to stop it.
"Carl, are you okay? Are you hurt?" the minister kept asking as he helped Carl to his feet.
Carl just passed a hand over his brow and sighed, shaking his head. "Just some punk kids. I hope they'll wise-up someday."
His wet clothes clung to his slight frame as he bent to pick up the hose. He adjusted the nozzle again and started to water. Confused and a little concerned, the minister asked, "Carl, what are you doing?"
"I've got to finish my watering. It's been very dry lately," came the calm reply. Satisfying himself that Carl really was all right, the minister could only marvel.
Carl was a man from a different time and place. A few weeks later the three returned. Just as before their threat was unchallenged. Carl again offered them a drink from his hose.
This time they didn't rob him. They wrenched the hose from his hand and drenched him head to foot in the icy water.
When they had finished their humiliation of him, they sauntered off down the street, throwing catcalls and curses, falling over one another laughing at the hilarity of what they had just done.
Carl just watched them. Then he turned toward the warmth giving sun, picked up his hose, and went on with his watering.
The summer was quickly fading into fall Carl was doing some tilling when he was startled by the sudden approach of someone behind him. He stumbled and fell into some evergreen branches. As he struggled to regain his footing, he turned to see the tall leader of his summer tormentors reaching down for him.
He braced himself for the expected attack. "Don't worry old man, I'm not gonna hurt you this time." The young man spoke softly, still offering the tattooed and scarred hand to Carl.
As he helped Carl get up, the man pulled a crumpled bag from his pocket and handed it to Carl.
"What's this?" Carl asked.
"It's your stuff," the man explained.
"It's your stuff back, even the money in your wallet."
"I don't understand," Carl said. "Why would you help me now?"
The man shifted his feet, seeming embarrassed and ill at ease.
"I learned something from you," he said. "I ran with that gang and hurt people like you. We picked you because you were old and we knew we could do it. But every time we came and did something to you, instead of yelling and fighting back, you tried to give us a drink. You didn't hate us for hating you. You kept showing love against our hate."
He stopped for a moment. "I couldn't sleep after we stole your stuff, so here it is back." He paused for another awkward moment, not knowing what more there was to say.. "That bag's my way of saying thanks for straightening me out, I guess."
And with that, he walked off down the street. Carl looked down at the sack in his hands and gingerly opened it. He took out his retirement watch and put it back on his wrist. Opening his wallet, he checked for his wedding photo. He gazed for a moment at the young bride that still smiled back at him from all those years ago.
He died one cold day after Christmas that winter. Many people attended his funeral in spite of the weather. In particular the minister noticed a tall young man that he didn't know sitting quietly in a distant corner of the church.
The minister spoke of Carl's garden as a lesson in life. In a voice made thick with unshed tears,
he said, "Do your best and make your garden as beautiful as you can. We will never forget Carl and his garden."
The following spring another flyer went up. It read: "Person needed to care for Carl's garden."
The flyer went unnoticed by the busy parishioners until one day when a knock was heard at the minister's office door.
Opening the door, the minister saw a pair of scarred and tattooed hands holding the flyer. "I believe this is my job, if you'll have me," the young man said.
The minister recognized him as the same young man who had returned the stolen watch and wallet to Carl. He knew that Carl's kindness had turned this man's life around. As the minister handed him the keys to the garden shed, he said, "Yes, go take care of Carl's garden and honor him."
The man went to work and, over the next several years, he tended the flowers and vegetables just as Carl had done. In that time, he went to college, got married, and became a prominent member of the community.
But he never forgot his promise to Carl's memory and kept the garden as beautiful as he thought Carl would have kept it. One day he approached the new minister and told him that he couldn't care for the garden any longer.
He explained with a shy and happy smile, "My wife just had a baby boy last night, and she's bringing him home on Saturday."
"Well, congratulations!" said the minister, as he was handed the garden shed keys.
"That's wonderful! What's the baby's name?"
"Carl," he replied. That's the whole gospel message simply stated.
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Attitude is Everything
One of the most influential men in my life told me once,
"I choose to be in a good mood." "Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or... I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it." "Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life."
"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested. "Yes, it is," he said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood." "You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."
I reflected on what he said. Soon thereafter, I left the job where we met to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.
Several years later, I heard that he was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, he was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back.
I saw him about six months after the accident.
When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins...Wanna see my scars?"
I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.
"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon-to-be born daughter," he replied.
"Then, as I lay on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or... I could choose to die. I chose to live."
"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked. He continued, "...the paramedics were great.
They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared.
In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man'. I knew I needed to take action."
"What did you do?" I asked.
"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," he said. "She asked if I was allergic to anything.
'Yes, I replied.' The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply.
I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Gravity'."
Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."
He lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34.
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
THE LIGHTER SIDE...........
Tips could be of use
MATHEMATICIANS hunt elephants by going to Africa, throwing out everything that is not an elephant, and catching one of whatever is left.
EXPERIENCED MATHEMATICIANS will attempt to prove the existence of at least one unique elephant before proceeding to step 1 as a subordinate exercise.
PROFESSORS OF MATHEMATICS will prove the existence of at least one unique elephant and then leave the detection and capture of an actual elephant as an exercise for their graduate students.
COMPUTER SCIENTISTS hunt elephants by exercising Algorithm A:
Go to Africa.
Start at the Cape of Good hope.
Work northward in an orderly manner, traversing the continent alternately east and west.
During each traverse pass,
Catch each animal seen.
Compare each animal caught to a known elephant.
Stop when a match is detected.
EXPERIENCED COMPUTER PROGRAMMERS modify Algorithm A by placing a known elephant in Cairo to ensure that the algorithm will terminate.
ASSEMBLY LANGUAGE PROGRAMMERS prefer to execute Algorithm A on their hands and knees.
DATABASE ADMINISTRATORS do not need to go out and capture elephants when they can retrieve them simply with an ad hoc query: SELECT * FROM AFRICAN_CRITTERS
2 WHERE CRITTER_TYPE = 'TERRESTRIAL'
3 AND SIZE = 'LARGE'
4 AND COLOR = 'GRAY'
5 AND TRUNK ='YES'
6 AND ODOR IS NOT NULL;
ENGINEERS hunt elephants by going to Africa, catching gray animals at random, and stopping when any one of them weighs within plus or minus 15 percent of any previously observed elephant.
SYSTEMS INTEGRATION ENGINEERS are not so concerned with hunting elephants as with creating a seamless interface between the elephants and their environment.
ECONOMISTS don't hunt elephants, but they believe that if elephants are paid enough, they will hunt themselves.
STATISTICIANS hunt the first animal they see N times and call it an elephant.
CONSULTANTS don't hunt elephants, and many have never hunted anything at all, but they can be hired by the hour to advise those people who do.
OPERATIONS RESEARCH CONSULTANTS can also measure the correlation of hat size and bullet color to the efficiency of elephant-hunting strategies, if some one else will only identify the elephants.
POLITICIANS don't hunt elephants, but they will share the elephants you catch with the people who voted for them.
LAWYERS don't hunt elephants, but they do follow the herds around arguing about who owns the droppings.
SOFTWARE LAWYERS will claim that they own an entire herd based on the look and feel of one dropping.
VICE PRESIDENTS OF ENGINEERING, RESEARCH, AND DEVELOPMENT try hard to hunt elephants, but their staffs are designed to prevent it. When the vice president does get to hunt elephants, the staff will try to ensure that all possible elephants are completely pre-hunted before the vice president sees them. If the vice president does see a non-pre-hunted elephant, (in other words, a live one) the staff will:
compliment the vice president's keen eyesight and
enlarge itself to prevent any recurrence.
SENIOR MANAGERS set broad elephant-hunting policy based on the assumption that elephants are just like field mice, but with deeper voices.
QUALITY ASSURANCE INSPECTORS ignore the elephants and look for mistakes the other hunters made when they were packing the jeep.
SALES PEOPLE don't hunt elephants but spend their time selling elephants they haven't caught, for delivery two days before the season opens.
SOFTWARE SALES PEOPLE ship the first thing they catch and write up an invoice for an elephant.
HARDWARE SALES PEOPLE catch rabbits, paint them gray, and sell them as desktop elephants.
GRADUATE STUDENTS don't hunt elephants, but they sure enjoy driving around in jeeps.
THE LIGHTER SIDE...........
Mother: "Beta, be a good boy and say 'ah-h-ah' so that doctor can get his finger out of your mouth"
Bad temper problem
Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people.
Doctor: Tell me about your problem.
Patient: I just did, didn't I, you stupid fool!!
I want to lose some weight
A man, seeking to lose some of his excess weight, visited the local doctor.
John: How can I lose twelve pounds of ugly fat?
Doctor: Of course! Cut your head off.
Malnutrition?
-feel tired and weak.
-feel like you never have the energy to clean your home, make meals or even do
the dishes.
-have difficulty losing or gaining weight.
-can't easily get to sleep.
-feel stressed and/or nervous.
-feel drowsy during the day.
-sometimes can't concentrate, you're mind feels numb, or you get
confused easily.
-have problems with your digestion.
-have constipation and/or hard dry stools.
-have mood swings, or get easily upset.
-don't have patience for anything.
-sometimes feel depressed.
-have overly dry or oily skin.
-sometimes have nausea and/or abdominal pain.
-have annoying eye twitches.
-bruise easily.
-have muscle cramps and/or low back pain.
-sometimes get cracks and sores in the corners of your mouth.
-notice that your nails have become thin and/or brittle.
-are losing your hair.
-have water retention.
-have uncontrollable temper outbursts.
-don't eat a well-balanced nutritious diet EVERY DAY
Fruit and Vegetable Juices for health.
Freshly made juices are a tremendous source of bio-available vitamins and minerals which are the partners of enzymes and co-enzymes. Vitamins activate enzymes and without vitamins, enzymes could not carry out their work, and we could not live.
Enzymes act as catalysts in hundreds of thousands of chemical reactions that take place throughout your body, and are essential for digesting, absorbing and converting food into body tissue. Enzymes produce energy at the cellular level and are critical for most of the metabolic activities taking place in your body every second of every day.
Another benefit of drinking fresh juices and smoothies is that your body can absorb MORE of the vitamins and minerals than if you were to eat the fruits and vegetables whole! Many of the nutrients are TRAPPED in the fiber and by blending fruits and vegetables, you break down the fiber and release the vital nutrients.
When you eat a raw carrot, you are only able to assimilate a small percentage of the available beta carotene. When a carrot is juiced, removing the fiber, a LARGE percentage of the beta carotene can be assimilated by your body.
Of course, you still need to eat whole produce because fiber is also an important part of your daily diet.
Natural vitamins are found only in living things, that is, plants and animals.
Your body, with a few exceptions, can't manufacture vitamins. They must be supplied in your food or in dietary supplements but supplements can't replace food, especially fruits and vegetables which provide thousands of substances, some of which have well-known functions, and some whose roles in the human body are not yet understood or recognized.
Vitamins and minerals … ...
◊ reduce your risk of getting a stroke or heart attack!
◊ strengthen your nails!
◊ improve your hair condition, strength and growth by providing certain essential nutrients to the hair follicle!
◊ beautify your skin by keeping it smooth, soft and disease-free!
◊ provide essential compounds that are necessary for growth, health, normal metabolism and physical well-being! Without them, you would die!
◊ promote normal growth and development!
◊ maintain bone density and strength!
◊ regulate blood clotting!
◊ help in the function of nerves and muscles, including regulating a normal heart beat!
Blow the Stress and Feel the Life.
What is stress?
“A force of sufficient magnitude which when applied to a system will either deform or distort the system.” ( Physics & Engineering )
The word 'stress’ is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as "a state of affair involving demand on physical or mental energy". Researchers explain Stress in Human beings as the “non specific response of the body to any demand made upon it.”
It also can be described as a condition or circumstance (not always adverse), which can disturb the normal physical and mental health of an individual. This demand on mind-body occurs when it tries to cope with incessant changes in life.
At one point or the other everybody suffers from stress. Relationship demands, physical as well as mental health problems, pressure at workplaces, traffic snarls, meeting deadlines, growing-up tensions—all of these conditions and situations are valid causes of stress. People have their own methods of stress management.
Observe & recognize the Stress
It is important to recognize whether you are under stress or out of it. Many times, even if we are under the influence of a stressful condition and our body reacts to it internally as well as externally, we fail to realize that we are reacting under stress.
We get habituated to stress
This also happens when the causes of stress are there long enough for us to get habituated to them. The body constantly tries to tell us through symptoms such as rapid palpitation, dizzy spells, tight muscles or various body aches that something is wrong. It is important to remain attentive to such symptoms and to learn to cope with the situations.In some people, stress-induced adverse feelings and anxieties tend to persist and intensify. Learning to understand and master stress management techniques can help prevent the counter effects of this urban malaise.
Observe your emotions.
Our present emotions reflect the present state of our nervous system with all its past imprints. Whenever we have an experience, these imprints enter into our response, which means that most of our reactions are echoes from the past. We do not really live in the present.
Emotions arouse two sensations-
PAIN and PLEASURE.
It is natural all of us want to avoid pain and pursue Pleasure
Researchers at Duke University showed hostility and mistrust to be key predictors of heart disease and early death. H.J. Eysenck summarized a group of European studies and found the following:
1."Individuals who tended to repress their emotions in the face of stress were far likelier than others to die of cancer."
2."Those who rated high on emotional frustration and aggression had a high rate of cardiac related deaths."
How does Stress affects us?
“The General Adaptation Syndrome”
Doctors call the body’s reaction to stress as
General Adaptation Syndrome (GAS).
There are three stages to GAS.
1.ALARM REACTION
In the first stage of GAS called alarm reaction, the body releases adrenaline and a variety of other psychological mechanisms to combat the stress and to stay in control. This is called fight or flight response. The muscles tense, the heart beats faster, the breathing and perspiration increases, the eyes dilate, the stomach may clench. This is done by nature to protect you in case something bad happens. Once the cause of the stress is removed, the body will go back to normal.
2.RESISTANCE OR ADAPTATION
If the cause for the stress is not removed, GAS goes to its second stage called resistance or adaptation. This is the body’s response to long term protection. It secretes further hormones that increase blood sugar levels to sustain energy and raise blood pressure. The adrenal cortex (outer covering) produces hormones called corticosteroids for this resistance reaction. Overuse by the body's defense mechanism in this phase eventually leads to disease.
If this adaptation phase continues for a prolonged period of time without periods of relaxation and rest to counterbalance the stress response, sufferers become prone to fatigue, concentration lapses, irritability and lethargy as the effort to sustain arousal slides into negative stress.
3. EXHAUSTION
In this stage, the body has run out of its reserve of body energy and immunity. Mental, physical and emotional resources suffer heavily. The body experiences "adrenal exhaustion". The blood sugar levels decrease as the adrenals become depleted, leading to decreased stress tolerance, progressive mental and physical exhaustion, illness and collapse.
Excessive stress may cause-
1.Emotional problems including insomnia, fatigue,lack of concentration, or restlessnes.
2.may lead to drug use, including excessive use of
sleeping pills, vitamin pills and pain killers
3.may lead to cardio vascular problems
4.may cause gastro intestinal problems such as
ulcers, colitis or digestive problems.
5.may cause allergic reactions
6.may cause sexual disorders in males and females.
How to cope with or manage Stress (Effectively)?
Methods of coping with stress are aplenty. If we study Stress deeply, we would observe that our internal agitations are causing stress and not truly, the external disturbances.
What are these internal agitations and where it is happening?
They are in fact our thoughts which are causing stress and it is happening in our mind.
"Stress is the by-product of thoughts.
These thoughts that cause stress fit into 2 categories:
1) they are thoughts related to an event that has already taken place - better known as the past and
2) they are thoughts that relate to a situation or event that may or may not take place - also known as the future."
(Stress arises in a person when his mind overpowers his intellect- the power of the mind to think in a logical manner. When his desires and attachments override his intellect; When the intellect loses control over the minds desires, the person becomes disturbed. Stress is the mental agitations caused by unfulfilled desires.)
If we understand this truth, we can effectively address and manage Stress. (This is explained in detail, in our program with methods and processes)
Of course there are several other followed techniques like Change in lifestyle, Relaxation techniques such as meditation, physical exercises, listening to soothing music deep breathing, various natural and alternative methods, personal growth techniques, visualization and massage etc which gives some relief to Stress in normal life.
How You Can Stay Healthier?
What You Can Do?
To keep stress, especially chronic stress from damaging your health, it’s important to be sure that your body does not experience excessive states of this physiological arousal.
There are two important ways to do this:
1.Learn Tension Taming techniques like relaxation response, yoga, deep breathing, meditation etc.
2. Practice C.T.P.
We offer an unique technique called CTP “Contra Thought Process” to understand, recognize, manage and cope stress that can be learned easily and practiced when you’re under stress, helping you feel better relatively quickly.
Prevent Excess Stress:
Some acute stress is unavoidable, but much of the episodic acute stress and chronic stress -the stress that damages our health-that we experience can be avoided or minimized with the practice of the methods given above.
welhealth9@yahoo.co.in
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Be Smart but Don't be Outsmart!
For days the eagle watched the chickens from a distance until one day he was certain that he could stop the beautiful eagle before she reached the chicken house. With the prowess of an eagle, he was suddenly between the eagle and the chicken house. She trembled.
He spoke. "What are you doing living down here like a chicken." She answered, "I am a chicken." He argued, showing her the similarities between himself and her. He told her of what it was like to be an eagle and soar high above the earth. His stories only frightened her.
Finally she said, "Well, if I'm an eagle, then you will not harm me." He responded in the affirmative. She said, "Then step back and show me."
As he stepped back, she ran into the chicken house. When the other chickens questioned her, she told them how she had outsmarted the eagle. Of course, all the chickens commended her for tricking the eagle.
Many of us are like the female eagle. We outsmart ourselves with betrayals of who we really are. Our choices are predicated on our beliefs, and our beliefs have been adopted from the same process inherent to the story about the chickens and the eagle.
Time management:
Effective time management is a primary means to a less stressful life. These practices can help you reduce your stress and reclaim your personal life.
Do you find yourself overwhelmed by the number of projects you have at work or the depth of these projects?
Do you feel the day flies by without your devoting the necessary attention to each assignment because other tasks keep landing on your desk, or because you can't get it all organized?
You probably know that effective time management will help you get more done each day. It has important health benefits, too. By managing your time more wisely, you can minimize stress and improve your quality of life.
But how do you get back on track when organizational skills don't come naturally?
To get started, choose one of these tips, try it for two to four weeks and see if it helps. If it does, consider adding another one. If not, try a different one.
Plan each day. Planning your day can help you feel more in control of you life. Write a to-do list, putting the most important tasks at the top. Keep a schedule of your daily activities to minimize conflicts and last-minute rushes.
Prioritize your tasks. Like many people, you may be spending the majority of your time on a small percentage of your tasks. Prioritizing will ensure you spend your time and energy on those that are truly important to you.
Say no to nonessential tasks. Consider your goals and schedule before agreeing to take on additional work.
Delegate. Take a look at your to-do list and consider what you can eliminate or pass on to someone else.
Take the time you need to do a quality job. Doing work right the first time may take more time upfront, but errors usually result in time spent making corrections, which takes more time overall.
Break large, time-consuming tasks into smaller tasks. Work on them a few minutes at a time until you get them all done.
Practice the 10-minute rule. Work on a dreaded task for 10 minutes each day. Once you get started, you may find you can finish it.
Evaluate how you're spending your time. Keep a diary of everything you do for three days to determine how you're spending your time. Look for time that can be used more wisely. For example, could you take a bus or train to work and use the commute to catch up on reading? If so, you could free up some time to exercise or spend with family or friends.
Get plenty of sleep and exercise. Improved focus and concentration will help improve your efficiency so that you can complete your work in less time.
Take a time management course. If your employer offers continuing education, take a time management class. If your workplace doesn't have one, find out if a local community college, university or community education program does.
Take a break when needed. Too much stress can derail your attempts at getting organized. When you need a break, take one. Take a walk. Do some quick stretches at your workstation. Take a day of vacation.
(compiled)
Work-life balance: Ways to restore harmony and reduce stress
Finding work-life balance in today's frenetically-paced world is no simple task. Spend more time at work than at home and you miss out on a rewarding personal life. Then again, if you're facing challenges in your personal life such as caring for an aging parent or coping with marital or financial problems, concentrating on your job can be difficult.
Whether the problem is too much focus on work or too little, when your work life and your personal life feel out of balance, stress — and its harmful effects — is the result.
To take control, first consider how the world of work has changed, then reevaluate your relationship to work and apply these strategies for striking a more healthy balance.
How work invades your personal life
There was a time when employees showed up for work Monday through Friday and worked eight to nine hours. The boundaries between work and home were fairly clear then. But the world has changed and, unfortunately, the boundaries have blurred for many workers.
Here's why:
Global economy. As more skilled workers enter the global labor market and companies outsource or move more jobs to reduce labor costs, people feel pressured to work longer and produce more to protect their jobs.
International business. Work continues around the world 24 hours a day for some people. If you work in an international organization, you might be on call around the clock for troubleshooting or consulting.
Advanced communication technology. People now have the ability to work anywhere — from their home, from their car and even on vacation. And some managers expect that.
Longer hours. Employers commonly ask employees to work longer hours than they're scheduled. Often, overtime is mandatory. If you hope to move up the career ladder, you may find yourself regularly working more than 40 hours a week to achieve and exceed expectations.
Changes in family roles. Today's married worker is typically part of a dual-career couple, which makes it difficult to find time to meet commitments to family, friends and community.
If you've experienced any of these challenges, you understand how easy it is for work to invade your personal life.
Overtime obsession
It's tempting to work overtime if you're an hourly employee. By doing so, you can earn extra money for a child's college fund or dream vacation. Some people need to work overtime to stay on top of family finances or pay for extra, unplanned expenses.
If you're on salary, working more hours may not provide extra cash, but it can help you keep up with your workload. Being willing to arrive early and stay late every day may also help earn that promotion or bonus.
Before you sign up for overtime, consider the pros and cons of working extra hours on your work-life balance:
Fatigue. Your ability to think and your eye-hand coordination decrease when you're tired. This means you're less productive and may make mistakes. These mistakes can lead to injury or rework and negatively impact your professional reputation.
Family. You may miss out on important events, such as your child's first bike ride, your father's 60th birthday or your high-school reunion. Missing out on important milestones may harm relationships with your loved ones.
Friends. Trusted friends are a key part of your support system. But if you're spending time at the office instead of with them, you'll find it difficult to nurture those friendships.
Expectations. If you work extra hours as a general rule, you may be given more responsibility. This could create a never-ending and increasing cycle, causing more concerns and challenges.
Sometimes working overtime is important. It's a choice you can make to adjust to a new job or new boss or to pay your bills. If you work for a company that requires mandatory overtime, you won't be able to avoid it, but you can learn to manage it.
If you work overtime for financial reasons or to climb the corporate ladder, do so in moderation. Most importantly, say no when you're too tired, when it's affecting your health or when you have crucial family obligations.
Striking the best work-life balance
It isn't easy to juggle the demands of career and personal life. For most people, it's an ongoing challenge to reduce stress and maintain harmony in key areas of their life.
Here are some ideas to help you find the balance that's best for you:
Keep a log. Track everything you do for one week. Include work-related and non-work-related activities. Decide what's necessary and satisfies you the most. Cut or delegate activities you don't enjoy, don't have time for or do only out of guilt. If you don't have the authority to make certain decisions, talk to your supervisor.
Take advantage of your options. Find out if your employer offers flex hours, a compressed work week, job-sharing or telecommuting for your role. The flexibility may alleviate some of your stress and free up some time.
Manage your time. Organize household tasks efficiently. Doing one or two loads of laundry every day rather than saving it all for your day off, and running errands in batches rather than going back and forth several times are good places to begin. A weekly family calendar of important dates and a daily list of to-dos will help you avoid deadline panic. If your employer offers a course in time management, sign up for it.
Rethink your cleaning standards. An unmade bed or sink of dirty dishes won't impact the quality of your life. Do what needs to be done and let the rest go. If you can afford it, pay someone else to clean your house.
Communicate clearly. Limit time-consuming misunderstandings by communicating clearly and listening carefully. Take notes if it helps.
Fight the guilt. Remember, having a family and a job is okay — for both men and women.
Nurture yourself. Set aside time each day for an activity that you enjoy, such as walking, working out or listening to music. Unwind after a hectic workday by reading, practicing yoga or taking a bath or shower.
Set aside one night each week for recreation. Take the phone off the hook, power down the computer and turn off the TV. Discover activities you can do with your partner, family or friends, such as playing golf, fishing or canoeing. Making time for activities you enjoy will rejuvenate you.
Protect your day off. Try to schedule some of your routine chores on workdays so that your days off are more relaxing.
Get enough sleep. There's nothing as stressful and potentially dangerous as working when you're sleep-deprived. Not only is your productivity affected, but you can also make costly mistakes. You may then have to work even more hours to make up for these mistakes.
Bolster your support system. Give yourself the gift of a trusted friend or co-worker to talk with during times of stress or hardship. If you're part of a religious community, take advantage of the support your religious leader can provide. Ensure you have trusted friends and relatives who can assist you when you need to work overtime or travel for your job.
Seek professional help. Everyone needs help from time to time. If your life feels too chaotic to manage and you're spinning your wheels worrying about it, talk with a professional such as your doctor, a psychologist or a counselor recommended by your employee assistance program (EAP).
Services provided by your EAP are usually free of charge and confidential. This means no one but you will know what you discuss. And if you're experiencing high levels of stress because of marital, financial, chemical dependency or legal problems, an EAP counselor can link you to helpful services in your community.
You now have some suggestions for improving the balance between your work and your personal life. Why not take the next step and give these suggestions a try?
Balance doesn't mean doing everything. Examine your priorities and set boundaries. Be firm in what you can and cannot do. Only you can restore harmony to your lifestyle.
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Welhealth Team
Warrior Associates
Wellness & Holistic Health Facilitators
welhealth9@yahoo.co.in